Tuesday, January 19, 2016

In This Box




I can’t fit this poem in this box
I ask an old friend to do it for me


I can’t fit this poem in this box
Though I can do many other things


I can’t fit this poem in this box
I let the edges spill over


I can’t fit this poem in this box
Another poem might work better. Or maybe not.


I can’t fit this poem in this box
But I will fit this song


I can’t fit this poem in this box
I’ll set it on the top


I can’t fit this poem in this box
A bigger box will do


I can’t fit this poem in this box
I will fit it in this urn

Click here for the Audio version

10 comments:

  1. I really like this poem, especially the contrast in the colors of text. I agree that if you try to hard to force poem to conform inside a box, all of its creativity and worth essentially dies.

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  2. Really really nice job on this, it's a beautiful and strong poem. I guess I'm drawn to it because the end is so halting and I love poems like that, and try to shoot for a sort of BANG mic drop at the end of my stuff too. The lull you fall into when you're reading it is great, it builds up a very cool rhythm that I think compliments the idea of this poem nicely. It's a very dope interpretation of the prompt, really nice job Maddie

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  3. I think this is interesting. I like that you came up with a poem to talk about fitting a poem into a box. The idea of putting it to song is also cool. Like the Bob Dylan quote "Poetry is a naked person" maybe this poem needed to be covered up. It's interesting to put the poem in an urn. Maybe the structure of the box was too stiff or had crack, and needed it to be liquid tight to hold it.

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  4. The last line is devastating, really nice. I like that it's ambiguous. There's an implication that you have to kill the poem to fit in in a restrictive container, but there's also elements of poetry's relationship to grief, pain, the basic aspects of life that poets return to again and again, like death. Very nice. I think I'd leave the last line the same color as the rest, though. It seems more understated that way, and allows the reader to decide how important the last line is.

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  5. I think our recording turned out very well! The different solutions to the problem show that a poem cannot be restricted. I also enjoyed the different color choice for the last line. The whole poem follows the same pattern, but the color change really sets this line apart from the rest of the poem. It also prompts the reader to think more about what that line means.

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  6. I loved how this post really highlights the almost unconstrained spirit that a poem has; it's ability to not conform to just one idea. Also, the audio, your emphasizing a different word in the sentence each time, really brought home your point and added depth to the poem.

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  7. I loved how this post really highlights the almost unconstrained spirit that a poem has; it's ability to not conform to just one idea. Also, the audio, your emphasizing a different word in the sentence each time, really brought home your point and added depth to the poem.

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  8. I really love the way you did this! Your repetition flows beautifully. The way that you end the poem is very strong, putting into the urn almost sounds like a way of saying that to deal with the poem that wouldn't fit, you had to kill it. Very mysterious, I really enjoyed this.

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  10. Wow this is super interesting. I agree with previous comments, something about the repetition and the last line as a team really pack a punch. I had to read this a few times, but once I did I really felt the weight of your words. Awesome poem!

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